Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from July 14, 2013

Hormonies and the Flurry of Shame

Menfolk, feel free to skip this post. It's about to be way TMI up in here. 
Also, if you work with me feel free to skip this. 
With the pending nuptials coming up in just under 2 months (!!!), I've started taking birth control. I'll spare you the details, but suffice to say this is my first go-round with them. While the Bearded Wonder and I love children, we want to enjoy being married for a few years first. Do some traveling, get a dog, you know, the uze'.

So. The birth control regimen started on Monday night, and by Tuesday night I was a raging hot mess. Everyone says, "side effects may include mood changes, in/de-crease of appetite, etc.".

Ha.
What they fail to mention is the seething rage that makes you want to rip the faces off of those you love. Not because they've done anything other than happen to be in your general vicinity. What they also don't mention is that you'll burst into tears at the drop of a hat, or at the site of your extremely …

Pass the cheese, please

Moooorning!

I swear I'm not a morning person. I've told you this before. However keyboards are magical little beings that enable me to "speak" in such a way that tricks you into thinking I am, in fact, a chipper morning person.

I am not.


This is me in the mornings, sans slippers. Hot, right?

I was standing in my closet this morning, lamenting that I can't wear my gorgeous Modcloth dress all day everyday, and I decided to base my clothing decision on the fact that I was not going to the gym today.

That's right. Spanx rolled on, wedge shoes on, flower in my hurr. Oh yes. No gym for this girl today.

But then it happened.
The thoughts started rolling in.

"2 months! Woohoo! OHMYGRAVY* 2 MONTHS!"
"I should go to the gym. Ain't no thang. Get in get out bada bing bada boom."
"Ewww Spanx after a workout…"
"I could start running! Ha. Running. That's funny. Did I just consider running? Did that just happen?"
"A slight…